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Read my career planning for doctors's blog

Why do people not state what they want?

28/6/2021

17 Comments

 
I often come across people who... despite their obvious desire to be developing their career in some way or changing their career - will simply not state what it is they want. There is something holding them back. 

This is a very interesting dynamic and when I ask why they wont say what they want or are finding fault with every options that emerges from our conversations.....some will say "but that is why I have got in touch".

However, it is not my job to tell you what you want ( I say) - it is my job to help you do things like: 
explore your options 
find out why the current career has not met your expectations
uncover what will truly motivate you - your career dream or a new passion or focus
feel more empowered to state what it is you want

but not to tell you what you want.

I think there is a misconception that career guidance is about providing  a shortlist of options from which you merely have to pick. This is the "career shelf" system so often used in schools ( my school had a careers library room with books on a shelf). Anyway - after 30 years plus of talking to people about their careers - this is simply not my style - because.... it doesn't work. In fact it often leads to disappointment, dead ends, plateaus or frank mismatch.

There is a place for provisional shortlisting of sorts - but I believe this has to be a starting point for discussion and further explorations. A career needs to fit someone and it needs to be researched, to evolve and grow in order to fit and so merely picking off a shelf is not a helpful start.

Some people however are very very uncomfortable stating what it is they want. And I know they have good reasons. The reasons are potentially multiple and it is complex so I am writing a short course on this . It afflicts so many and understanding why a person is unable to say will help a them move from "but i don't know what I want" to " I'd love to do x y x ..... I now know how to take that forwards, what I have to offer it and how it matches my needs. Far from picking an option from a list or.. a shelf.
17 Comments
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22/10/2023 11:14:34 pm

I completely agree with your approach to career guidance. It's not about spoon-feeding options but about helping individuals unlock their potential and find their true calling. Many people struggle to vocalize their career aspirations, often due to a fear of making the wrong choice or societal pressures. Your emphasis on understanding one's motivations and empowering them to state what they want is commendable. I'm excited to hear about your upcoming short course on this topic. It's evident that you have a wealth of experience in this field, and I'm sure your insights will be invaluable for anyone seeking career guidance. Here's to helping people transition from uncertainty to clarity in their career choices!

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30/10/2023 07:19:35 pm

This blog post touches upon a significant aspect of career planning that often goes unnoticed. It's quite perplexing to encounter individuals who, despite their evident desire for career development or change, struggle to verbalize their goals. I believe this hesitation may arise from various factors, including fear of judgment or uncertainty about the path ahead. It's essential to recognize that career advisors, like the author, are here to facilitate the process rather than dictate it. Their role is to assist individuals in exploring their options, understanding their own expectations, uncovering their sources of motivation, and ultimately, finding the courage to state what they truly want in their careers. This blog provides valuable insights into this complex dynamic and offers a helpful perspective for both career advisors and those seeking guidance.


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Great post! It’s so true that many doctors struggle to vocalize their career goals, often because we’re trained to follow a very specific, rigid path. Breaking out of that "autopilot" mode and actually stating what you want—whether it’s better work-life balance, a leadership role, or a niche specialty—is the first step toward avoiding burnout. Thanks for shedding light on the psychological barriers that keep us from being honest about our professional desires.

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    Sonia Hutton-Taylor
    MBBS FRCS FRCOphth DO ( early retired)
    founder Medical Forum 1990

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